Nancy Gets Spanked

Listener FTW! (NSFW, Sexy)

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Sounds like a porn spam e-mail, doesn’t it?

Not so much.

And most important of all, why didnt they hire an expert to show actor Demian Bichir how to deliver a proper spanking to Mary-Louise Parker in last nights episode—you know, one that would really leave handprints on her butt instead of those obviously painted-on ones she flashed later on?

Fleshbot has the video clips.

Sienna Miller gets enhanced for new film

Listener FTW! (Celebrities, Sexy)

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“A merkin or pubic wig simply wouldnt have done the trick, but luckily computer wizardry came to the rescue.

“Siennas private parts were digitally enhanced, giving her a rather unruly, loud and proud bush.

“All the cast had a good giggle about it and stoical Sienna happily played along.

“But its safe to say this is one look she wont be recreating on her next summer hols.”

I don’t know what to say.

do you live in sin and plan to get married? you’re doing it right.

Listener FTW! (Random)

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The odds of divorce among women who married their only cohabiting partner were 28% lower than among women who never cohabited before marriage, according to sociologist Daniel Lichter of Cornell University in Ithaca, N.Y.

So, in other words, live with your long-term lover if you seriously plan to marry him/her and maybe you won’t divorce later.

I started living with my now-wife in 2000, and we got married in 2003. And most of you know what I’m dealing with. Just call me the minority.

Legislators Aim to Snuff out Penalties for Pot Use

LowCommotion FTW! (Drugs, Politics, Your Rights)

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Rob Kampia, director of the Marijuana Policy Project, said marijuana arrests outnumber arrests for “all violent crimes combined,” meaning that police are spending inordinate amounts of time chasing nonviolent criminals.

oh my god. WAKE UP PEOPLE!

My Tales – The Daily WTF

Listener FTW! (Work)

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Min’s resume looked fairly decent, aside from a few minor typos DCMO instead of DCOM, Visual Basics 6, etc and a few minor impossibilities Oracle T-SQL and Microsoft Solaris. I had seen far worse and figured, with the language barrier and all, I’d give her the benefit of the doubt.

“I see on your résumé that you were a VB6 programmer at your last job,” I asked in the interview, “can you give me an idea of your day-to-day?”

“Mostly,” Min replied, “I tested, and make sure our program did not crash.”

“Oh,” I said, “so, like unit-testing with VB?”

“Actually,” she clarified, “I did not use VB. Just our program. But, program was written in VB.”

It didn’t take me too long after that to figure out that Min had never actually used Visual Basic. Or C . Or, really, any other programming language.

“Min,” I questioned, “why would put all these skills and technologies on your résumé if you’ve never used them?”

“I figure,” she responded, “I would get interview this way. Then, maybe, job.”

A couple months later, on a visit to a meeting in an entirely different department, I ran into Min again. Apparently, she had been hired as a VB programmer for another group.

That’s me to a T. *chuckle*

Fratello Metallo – Yahoo News Photos

LowCommotion FTW! (Music, Religion)

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Friar Cesare Bonizzi, also known as Fratello Metallo Metal Friar C, poses with his band after a rehearsal session in downtown Milan July 10, 2008. Dressed in his traditional robe, sandals and twirling the rope around his waist, 62-year old Bonizzi is no ordinary heavy metal rocker. But as guitarists around him belt out heavy notes, the long-white-bearded Capuchin, a former missionary in Ivory Coast, has no qualms bobbing his head and shouting lyrics about alcohol, sex, tobacco and life in general into his microphone.

super-husbands who aren’t so super-awesome

Listener FTW! (Random)

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When the Hulk took his second wife, Caiera yes, hes been married twice it was on a planet hed recently liberated from a despotic overlord and saved from an alien menace. She was a proud warrior queen, making her capable not only of withstanding Hulks temper tantrums, but also his immense mojo.

So, the Hulk basically became king of an entire planent, married to his perfect woman and is surrounded by people who love him to pieces. What happens?

A massive explosion kills everyone except Hulk. Insert Trumpet Going “Wah-Wah-Wah-Waaaaaaaaaaaaaah.”

from Cracked.com

New Harry Potter trailer hits

Chromium FTW! (Movies)

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Hit it up for the goodness.

TOP 10 Sexiest Stormtroopers

Zombie16 FTW! (Sexy, Star Wars)

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Really this is pushing it as only it should be only Top 5 as 1, 2, 4, 5 & 9 are hot and in somewhat full Stormtrooper gear. Just getting a hot chic to wear a Stormtrooper helmet should not make the cut as being a sexy Stormtrooper, you need the breastplate FTW!

Downpour of Nintendo Financials

Zombie16 FTW! (Money, Video Games)

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First up we have big N’s financials Nintendo Co., Ltd. has just released its financial statement for Q1 FY3/09. Net sales were $3.9 billion for the quarter with a net income of $992 million.

Individual Unit Sales For The Quarter Are:

Wii

Japan – 530,000
North America – 2.5 million
Europe/Aus/Asia – 2.15 million
Total – 5.17 million

DS

Japan – 580,000
North America – 2.7 million
Europe/Aus/Asia – 3.65 million
Total – 6.94 million

And as strange as this sounds the Gamecube and the Gameboy Advance are still pushing units at retail:

Gamecube

North America – 40,000

Gameboy Advance

Worldwide – 180,000

I’m not sure what the hell everyone is playing except Mario Kart but damn if they don’t know how to make a shit ton of cash. Must be all those people like Chromium who bough Hannah Montana Sing Star Edition. Or it could be all those kids at EB who wanted Brunout Paradise for the Gamecube. Thanks Kotaku for all the goods.